What are some ways to help my social phobia?
Monday, December 22nd, 2008 at
4:49 pm
jack j asked:
summers coming and i need to do something…any suggestion for my social anxiety/phobia?
summers coming and i need to do something…any suggestion for my social anxiety/phobia?
Tagged with: Social Anxiety • Social Phobia • Suggestion
Filed under: Phobias
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Plenty of booze.
read this : “A Guide To Rational Living” by Albert Ellis.
Accept yourself for who you truly are. This is not resignation nor complacency, and will allow you to move forward at a rate that suits you and opens you up to learning that you CAN change.
Do what YOU -want- to do and do not denigrate yourself for possible mistakes, or for what other people may or may not think. Always accept yourself -unconditionally- with or without others acceptance, approval, love etc. Actively accept yourself in the face of strong opposition and hardship if you unfortunatley encounter it.Obvioulsy live and work to moral standards, but judge your ACTS instead of YOURSELF.
We all learn from our mistakes. Expect to not do too brilliantly as you practise trying new things. Then you will gain mastery of these things and become better. Do not put yourself down for mistakes, instead see mistakes as learning opportunities and dont jump to the conclusion that your ACTS make YOU. They are but a small part of you, an ever changing and complex human.
“failing” at something can never make you a “failure”. You are too complex and have too many sides, elements, behaviours, thoughts, and acts to be given a single, general, overgeneralised label. This label also predicts the future; which is illogical and unhelpful.
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Work towards this plan everyday, and try and notice how much progress you are making.
Behavioural pyschologists suggest that you also reward yourself after a successful completion of a task, whatever size it is. This sinks the message into your subconscious and reinforces any positive change.
Google the net for “NLP New Behaviour Generator” and “NLP Anchoring” – these are little excercises that may help you reach empowered states.
These are just some tips and goodluck with your path towards building confidence.
There’s nothing that says you have to fit in with a bunch of
people you have nothing in common with. Make sure that
your friends this summer are people you know and feel
comfortable around. Introductions through them will be
smoother and you can work outwards from there. If you
have a dog you can walk on the beach or in a park, you’re
apt to meet some other dog people and this is usually
comfortable because you can always just talk about
the dog and not yourself. Good place to start. Also, try
and volunteer for volleyball (group) or some other sport
that involves a lot of players…then you can start talking
about the game, etc.
some zoloft. really helped me. see a therapist and try to work it through.
It depends on how reserved you are.
I, being a little more on the shy side, sometimes try to push myself into certain situations where social interaction is demanded. Find a place with people who share your creative talents.
This is easier said than done. And I must admit I barely get around to it. It’s like jumping from an airplane while having a fear of heights.
Most of all, believe in yourself. Life comes and goes and there are many times you will ***** up and look stupid in front of people. How you learn from those situations is your best bet.
my answer is based on one semester of psy. in a community college but i think it rings true. The best way to tackle a phobia of any kind is to attack it head on. SO take small steps hang out with one person then two then small groups the go to a club then go to a show then go to the beach. next year you may be a social butterfly. Good luck
one really has to know more about your problem and about you in order to help. You should find a therapist or counselor. If money is tight (they are expensive) you can try your local university (colleges that train psychologists; couselors and social workers often have low cost clinics). You can also try your local public hospital. Try calling clinics listed in the phone book. Psychotherapy training centers can also be reasonably priced. Therapy is also offered on-line. You could also try self-help books. There are medications that can help, but you should try talking about it and practicing first. You can try practicing on your own too. Try social situations that are tolorable and do that for awhile, then try something a little more anxiety provoking. The goal is to keep increasing the type of anxiety provoking situation, until you can do it all. Tell yourself that it is only an unpleasant feeling and feelings cannot harm you. Tell yourself that you do not have to feel this way. You can also try getting very relaxed and imagining the difficult situations while you are relaxed. Every time that your imagination starts to make you anxious, re-relax yourself. Again, start with a managable imagined situation and little by little, over aperiod of time, make it more scary. The idea is to associate the relaxed feeling with the social situation so that they become connected. You can also find quiet time to think deeply about what it is that you’re afraid of and how this all may have got started.